A Tale of Smol Beans (Phan)
by GrabTheSaltAndHopInTheTardis
Summary: Sumary: Dan and Phil are having a normal day, when they decide to do a livestream, but litrally no one knows how much of a shitstorm they are going to cause. Basically fluff. This is my first story, so it's only going to be a oneshot. :) Rated T for kissing and swearing. Very Phan such wow.


Phantastic

Sumary: Dan and Phil are having a normal day, when they decide to do a livestream, but litrally no one knows how much of a shitstorm they are going to cause. Basically fluff

OW!

I rolled out of bed, suspended an inch from the ground by is bedsheets that my legs were entangled in. "Nyyyughrhgh" I groaned as he squirmed to get out of my warm prison. My legs hit the floor with a thump, and I managed to slide out onto the cold floor. Something smelled really good. Pancakes?

I got up, dressed in the usual black skinny jeans and ironic t-shirt, and blundered into the living room, where Phil had managed to get a pancake stuck… on the ceiling. I rubbed his eyes and blinked a few times to make sure that hI wasn't seeing things, and watched in bewilderment as Phil tried desperately to chisel it off of the ceiling with a spatula. "Phil what are you … Doing?" I yawned, still tired as frick. He spun around very quickly, almost falling over in the process. "Oh! Erm, hi, Dan. I was just, uh, making pancakes. I also have miraculously managed to get one stuck on the ceiling, because I was trying to do the thing that Dil was doing."

I doubled over laughing. "Phil, you and I both know how well things like that usually work out for us _and_ Dil." Just then the sink gurgled, and we both stared at it for about 2 minutes, waiting for a stream of water to start coming out of the drain. Nothing happened thankfully. "I'm surprised you can't just reach up and jump to it, you giant beanstalk."

He laughed. "Aww, come on Howell, I thought I was your smol bean."

I froze up. Heat started blooming in my chest, and I could feel it rising up into my face, turning it red. Phil almost definitely knew about my feelings for him. He basically saved my life a few years ago, and I'll be in his debt forever because of it. And after a while my feelings grew. And it was unbelievably obvious. The fanbase knows it as well. It'd be pretty hard to not know at this point, especially with all the "proofs" that desperate shippers on the internet came up with. And honestly, it's pretty amazing. They are all pretty spot on to be honest. After feeling my ears grow tingly I managed to squeak out, "I never said you were _my_ smol bean I just said you _were_ a smol bean."

Phil seemed to deflate a little bit, some of his usual sparkle leaving his eyes. Oh shit, now I felt bad. PHIL I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I thought desperately in my head. I scurried over to the cabinet to get a coffee mug. I poured myself a giant cup of it, over the gigantic pancake stack that Phil had put on the counter. Some dripped down onto the giant fluffy disks, right as Phil grabbed one to take a bite. "Dan THIS IS THE BEST THING I'VE EVER TASTED!" he yelled through the pancakes. I tried one, and it really was. Ten pancakes, a raw pancake batter right and about three giggle fits later, Phil and I were playing the Sims4. Dil and Tabitha went to the bar together and "kissed passionately" after Dil asked her a "Risque question." We got a gold medal for socialization.

Phil decided to jump on YouNow late that night. It was about 8 pm. I sat next to him and smiled quietly to myself. Interacting with our fanbase was really fun, especially since we got to kinda mess with their minds and see their reactions. Add that to the list of reasons why I'm an awful human being. Anyway Phil hopped on and after making sure that we were actually broadcasting, Phil started talking to them about our day.

"Hey guys! So I decided to do a liveshow with Dan tonight as we're going to be pretty busy over the next few weeks."

"Hello internet!" I was kinda absentmindedly listening, reading the comments. "Excellent meme usage by that anonymous user, well done," I said, talking over Phil for a second.

"So I wanted to tell you guys about this thing that happened today. So I was making pancakes, and you guy remember when Dil tried to flip a pancake using only the pan and it totally worked? Yeah well I tried it and I got it stuck to the ceiling! And then I started trying to scrape it off of the ceiling with a spatula when Dan walks in with hobbit hair all hunched over. Of course I didn't see him so when he suddenly made a comment on my clumsiness I nearly fell over."

"Well Phil I still don't understand why you couldn't just jump up to get it, you beanstalk."

"Oh and another thing! Dan keeps calling me a beanstalk when for like the past few weeks he's been calling me a smol bean! Which one do you guys think he should call me personally I think that I should be a smol bean since I'm shorter than him, but…"

Suddenly, I just couldn't help myself. He was just so amazing, and this particular conversation reminded me of how he would call me nice names to cheer me up when I was in my existential crisis stage of life. My feelings became so acute that I threw my arms around Phil's neck and kissed him on the lips, hard, his melding into mine. They were soft, and tasted like coffee and raspberry jelly beans. He stiffened up, and I broke away quickly, waiting for him to yell at me, or slap me. I felt like I was dying from heat exhaustion, my face was surely bright red, and the whole fanbase just saw that happen…

My eyes started watering as I looked down at my hands and heard the comments starting to ding.

Ding

Ding

Ding

Every single sound a little scrape on my sanity, dignity, and state of mind. I shouldn't have done that. I've screwed up. I've screwed up so bad, everyone's going to unfollow, we're going to get hate mail, Phil's going to get a restraining order or ask me to move out, and…

And then Phil kissed me back, pressing his face into mine, sliding his hands into my hair. And I kissed him back. Oh, how I kissed him back. He slammed the lid of his laptop right as the computer started dinging like crazy, and leaned into me.

I broke away, staring into his sky blue eyes, everything seeming a bit softer, more warm. "I love you, my smol bean," I said quietly. I smiled up at him, and ate up every inch of his complexion.

"I love you too my tall beanstalk," he whispered, as his face broke into a grin.

EPILOGUE

I went on Tumblr the next morning. I had 5000 email, 10000 comments on my most recent video, and the entire fandom had gone insane. Actually, the Tumblr staff were having to block people out so that the site wouldn't shut down from the sheer overload of shitposting by the fanbase. Everyone had gone crazy.

The craze lasted about a month, and guess what. Both of us got a million more subscribers over that month, and we got only 2 messages of hate mail.

Things worked out okay in the end. Like they always seem to do with me and my smol bean.


End file.
